Funny Bunnies

If you didn't already know it - kids are flippin' hysterical. My kids crack me up on a daily basis with some of the stuff that comes out of their mouths. And the kids at my school are no different.

So - to lighten the mood, here are some funny things that we have heard lately


Finley was having a conversation with Cainan in the car one day this week

Finley - Cainan, the sun does not like noses - only brains.
Cainan - the sun likes noses too
Finley - no it doesn't Cainan. The sun ONLY likes BRAINS
Cainan - not noses?
Finley - no. But the clouds.....clouds like noses. But the sun....the sun only likes brains
Cainan - okay.

Uh, what the heck? And this came out of the blue. That girl is a strange one.

------------------------------------
Arlington - (while listening to Joseph and the Technicolor Dreamcoat CD) - Mom? How does Joseph know what the dreams mean?

Me - well, that is what he was able to do.......tell the meaning of dreams. (now opening a can of worms) You know, Arlington, sometimes you can look up what dreams mean on the internet

Arlington - so we can google it

Me - how do you know that term?

Arlington - you and dad say it. Can we look it up?

Me - sure - what do you want to look up

Arlington - well, last night I had a dream about a rocket ship that wouldn't take off. It just sat there laughing at me. Can we look that up? What would that have meant?

Me - uh......sure.

----------------------------------------
Finley - (Friday morning in bed) Mom? Mom? Mom? I have something I need to tell you mom. (being very serious)
Me - (slightly annoyed because I am trying to get everyone ready for school) What is it Finley
Finley - mom.....my arm is missing.

I look over and she has tucked her arm in her shirt.
-----------------------------------------
We have nicknamed Finley "It wasn't me"
Me - Finley? Did you push your brother?
Finley - it wasn't me

Me - Finley? Did you write on the wall/
Finley- it wasn't me

Me - Finley? Did you draw on your body?
Finley - it wasn't me

Me - Finley? Did you take all the toys and put them under your pillow?
Finley - it wasn't me
------------------------------------
And the kids at school. What would I do without their daily humor? Working with the little kids is the best when it comes to daily laughs.

Most of the kids who crack me up start with........................Mrs. Pletcher? About a week ago.....

Stop right there, I tell them. If it didn't happen today, or at the VERY latest - yesterday, I don't want to here about it.

Or the kids that come down because they have a bug bite that is itching so bad they can't stand it, yet by the time they have gotten to my office they can't locate it. And neither can I.
---------------------------------
Kid - "I am allergic to silicone and I don't know that I am" (??????)

Okay.....which is it?

----------------------------------------

Kid - I don't fell well.
Me - I am sorry to hear that. what doesn't feel well?
Kid - everything. I think I have the plague.
---------------------------------
Kid - (looking at my food pyramid) - where does booze fit into the pyramid?

Are you kidding?
---------------------------------------------
Kid - (who is bleeding from picking a scab and blood is all over their leg) - don't wipe the blood up!!
Me- what? Why?
Kid - it looks so cool like that - I want to leave it.
Me - uh.....no.
-----------------------------------------------------
so far this year, I have had kids stick paper down in their ear (they didn't want to hear their teacher any more) and a rock down in their ear. (dare). I could get the rock, but the doctor had to get the paper! At least this year no one ate their lunch ticket. Like last year.

------------------------------------------------------------
I got a lot of thank you cards from the kids on Nurse's day. Some of my favorites:

"thank you for the lice cream" (I have no idea what this might be - I don't do anything with lice except send them home)
"thank you for helping my nose bleed after I picked my nose"
"thank you for the ice pack after my brother punched me at the bus stop"
"thank you for saving me from that tick"
"thank you for the magic chapstick"

-------------------------------------------
I have one diabetic in my school. He is a boy, so he does "boy" things at least once a week that make my eyes cross. Like sliding down the banister and knocking his insulin pump off. Or - trying to jump down 4 stairs at a time and (you guessed it) knocking his insulin pump off. Or - playing tackle football at recess when it is supposed to be touch football and (say it with me) knocking his insulin pump off. And each time he comes up......I look at him funny and he says "what?" We have our own comedy routine.

-----------------------------------------

I also have the 4th grade girl drama queens. I try to hide first thing in the morning. Otherwise they come to my office, sink down on the bed and tell me a sad tale. Like:

"I just came off the bus and I can't breathe". Me - where your running? Girl - no, but it is a long walk. (no it isn't. It is about 10 feet)

"I am starving" Me - did you eat breakfast? Girl - no. I had to do my hair.

------------------------------------
The kids keep me in stitches. I only have K-4, so they are all 10 and under. I love my job and enjoy coming. I enjoy listening to what the kids have to say. Someday soon they are going to grow up, and be cranky teenagers, and not want hugs when they fall, or cuddles when they are sad. So as crazy at it makes me some days to see 60 bug bites or 70 stomach aches, I wouldn't trade it for an older crowd.

Share with me some of your favorite stories! I would love to hear them. I LOVE to laugh. Leave me a comment telling me something funny you have heard lately.

See you next week. I am only making one new thing next week because we are having company and we will be going out! :)