The last Monday

Today was my last Monday as a school nurse at Haddam Elementary School.  Today, I spent recess with my kindergarteners.  I walked out onto the recess playground and was quickly swarmed by 60 little cuties about 3 1/2 feet tall.  I sat on the bench while they surrounded me - all wanting to write their names in my yearbook.  They had many questions about where I was going, why I was leaving, and when I would be back.

And then - like many 5 year olds - they were quickly ready to tell me all about their summer plans, and show me what color their tongues have turned from their recent popcicle.

I held it together, but it was hard.  I hugged as many as I could, and talked to all of them, and promised I would come back and visit.  I am sure they will forget me much faster than I will ever forget them.  I tried to memorize their little faces, and their little voices knowing that they will grow up and leave Haddam Elementary without me being there to watch.  It was almost painful to think about.

I know this is "just a job".  This is just where I work and kids come and go and the years pass.  But to me - this was not "just a job".  These kids and their families became my family.  I loved knowing them the best of anyone when they went to a new grade - I could walk into a class and name every child and talk about each of their personalities.  I knew who was always needing a little reassurance, and the ones who were always "faking".  I didn't have a class of 30 students.  I had a school of 260 students that I was responsible for, adored, and loved learning about.

So tomorrow is our last day.  The last day I will walk into that building and take care of those kids.  It will be the last time I work with my co-workers at HES.  For the first time ever, I am not looking forward to the end of a work day.  Tomorrow - we will wave at the kids as they pull away in their school buses - a tradition at the end of every school year.  We will cheer and wish them a good summer.  And then we will ring the large bell in the front of our school - I will have to ring it because I am leaving, and this is when I know I will lose it.